You Might Be a Scoutmaster If Joke
You just might be a Scoutmaster if:
- Most of your wardrobe is olive drab or khaki.
- You have holes in the pockets of your jeans from carrying a pocket knife.
- You begin to think half frozen French fries don't taste all that bad.
- You keep a bucket of water by your side while cooking dinner.
- You spontaneously break into strange songs in public.
- You can stare at a spider web for an hour, and not notice the time passing.
- You carry your own toilet paper wherever you go
- You always read by a flashlight.
- Your radio is always tuned to the weather station.
- You hoard tent stakes.
- You wear 2 pairs of socks to bed.
- You keep a lantern hanging outside your bathroom door.
- You sleep under a trash bag.
- You cannot walk by a piece of trash without picking it up.
- You carry a duffle bag size first-aid kit in your car.
- You always have hat hair.
- You continue to wear it until it stands on it's own.
- You're always counting how many matches you have left.
- You know all the words to "Little Bunny Foo-Foo", but can't remember where you left your briefcase.
- You see paint samples in a store and immediately want to name things in nature with the same colors.
- Your pots and pans are all black.
- You roast a mini-marshmallows on a paper clip over a candle; then put it on a golden graham with one square of chocolate, just to get the flavor.
- You always cook enough food for twelve.
- Pie iron pizzas is the best meal you've had all week.
- You always have a cup hooked to your belt.
- All your clothes have little pieces of egg stuck on them.
- You own little bits of every color felt.
- You open letters with a pocket knife.
- You have something on your shoe...and you're sure it's only mud.
- You eat ants on a log and like it.
- You wear bread bags on your feet.
- You know 365 one pot meals.
- Your "microwave" is a box wrapped in foil.
- When opening large gifts, you wonder if you have a piece of foil large enough to cover it.
- You buy your shampoo in little tiny bottles.
- You order pizzas 14 at a time.
- You have to urge to help little old ladies...whether they want it or not.
- Everything in your cupboard says "instant, just add water".
- Your neighbors hide when they see you going door to door with "that order form" again.
- You have to go to the restroom and you start looking for a buddy.
- You really do use those emergency sewing kits.
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Nov 03, 2020 - Danica
this sounds like the definition of a hoboNov 19, 2020 - Tyler
"Oh no, Harold! It's Mr. Scoutmaster with that order form! Hide the kids!"
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