Shaving Cream Song | |
| This Song is meant for Boy Scouts. Decide for yourself if it is appropriate for your younger scouts or not. | |
| The Tune: (The verses match My Bonnie just fine. But, the chorus is different.) | |
| Lyrics: | I have a sad story to tell you It may hurt your feelings a bit Last night when I walked into my bathroom I stepped in a pile of ... Chorus (repeat after every verse): Shaving cream, be nice and clean. Shave everyday and you'll always look keen. I think I'll break off with my girlfriend Her antics are queer I'll admit Each time I say, 'Darling, I love you' She tells me that I'm full of ... Our baby fell out of the window You'd think that her head would be split But good luck was with her that morning She fell in a barrel of ... An old lady died in a bathtub She died from a terrible fit In order to fulfill her wishes She was buried in six feet of ... When I was in France with the army One day I looked into my kit I thought I would find me a sandwich But the darn thing was loaded with ... And now, folks, my story is ended I think it is time I should quit If any of you feel offended Stick your head in a barrel of ... Many more verses... Our leader says Clean is a virtue, On his face you will see not one zit. Instead of washing with soap and hot water, He scrubs with a handful of ... Last Saturday I went out hiking, I like to keep physically fit, But when I stopped for a rest break, My boots were all covered with ... Let's have a cheer for the camp staff, They're definitely our favorite! But, every night at the campfire They lead us and sing just like ... I thought I would make me some tie-dyes And bought lots of colors for it. But after I dyed all my T-shirts They all were the color of ... Our leader made us all breakfast I asked him what food was in it. He laughed as he gave me a spoonful And said it was rice, beans, and ... I asked to come out and play baseball I'd just bought a new catchers mitt; I asked you to throw me a fastball but you threw me a big lump of ... Once while I was at the ball game, The batter smashed out a hit. But while he was running for second, He slipped in a big pile of ... Last night we all had a big snowstorm, And it's time to shovel, isn't it? The only good thing about snow is, It's better than shoveling ... They built a big wall in East Berlin. The biggest one that they could fit. But I found out what that big wall was made of. Well the whole thing was nothing but ... Here we are in this fine health food restaurant. I hate to be picking a nit. But, waiter, I ordered your tofu, And you brought me a plate full of ... Here we are in this fancy French restruant, And I hate to be picking a bit, But I ordered creamed fishie-soi And the waiter brought me a bowl of.. Here we are in this Mexican restaurant, I hate to be picking a nit, But waiter, I ordered 'El Burrito Supremo,' And you brought me a plate full of ... I am fed up with all politicians! On Republicans and Democrats I spit! They promise you peace and employment, But give you more of the same ... Our Christmas tree, it was so gorgeous, So brightly and brilliantly lit, And underneath were all of my presents! Yeah, boxes and boxes of ... I was laughing so hard at these lyrics, I thought that my sides they would split, I stopped laughing just now, however 'Cause my pants just filled up with my ... I went swimming in Lake Kukamunga I thought I would cool off a bit But when I stepped out of the water My body was covered in ... I bought a computer by mail... It arrived at my door in a kit. But although I followed instructions, I ended up with a box full of ... My program was nearly completed, In 640K it did fit, But then I wrote 'just one more feature,' And my program was blown all to ... I went out last night to the opera, I thought I'd relax for a bit. But when I sat down in my box seat I found it was covered with ... My in-laws came over to visit, But left in a terrible snit Because I suggested for dinner That they should have plates full of ... And now, folks, my song, it is ended, I do hope that you will admit, That if any of you feel offended You can stick your head in a bucket of ... My wife, she died in the bathtub, she died of a terrible fit, To fulfill her very last wishes, she was buried in six feet of ... My wife put a sack in the garden, I'm curious I will admit, One morning I sneaked out a handful, I found it was nothing but ... There was a young fellow from Sparta, who could flatulate ballads and airs, He could blow out a Mozart sonata, and accompany musical chairs; One day he attempted an opera - it was hard, but he just wouldn't quit - With his head held aloft, he suddenly coughed - and collapsed in a mountain of ... I know that these verses are scanty, the rhyme seems too much for my wit, I start out like Shakespeare and Dante, but somehow I end up with ... And now that my story is ended, and I must make my exit, If any of you feel offended, stick your head in a barrel of ... My father was a lavatory cleaner, He worked all day long in the pit And when he came home in the evening He'd be covered all over in ... Now some say he died of a fever And some say he died of a fit, But I know what my father died of: He died of the smell of the ... Now some say he's buried in gravel And some say he's buried in grit, But I know where my father is buried: He's buried in six feet of ... And some say he left me a fortune, While some say he left me a bit, But I know what my father left me: No more than a bucket of ... |
A Favorite Song
