Chicken Farmer Skit
This Skit has gross parts.
Required:
4 to 8 scouts
Preparation:
One scout stage left - the chicken hatchery owner
Rest of scouts stage right - pretending to all be in a big truck. The driver is a chicken farmer and the rest are his men.
Rest of scouts stage right - pretending to all be in a big truck. The driver is a chicken farmer and the rest are his men.
Script:
Hatcheryman: (reading a newspaper) Alright! Price of chicken has gone up again. I expect I'll be selling lots of these chicks from my hatchery.
(truck drives up and stops a ways away. Driver walks over to hatcheryman.)
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, there. Is this Chattanooga Charlie's Chicken Hatchery?
Hatcheryman: Sure is, and I'm Charlie. What can I do for ya?
Chicken Farmer: Well, I've been farming beets and spuds for the past 10 years and just haven't been making any money. I read that chicken prices are going up so I'm gonna start farming chickens instead. I need me 10 dozen chicks to get started.
Hatcheryman: Great, that'll be $100. Have your men load em up from right here. (points behind him to imaginary boxes.)
Chicken Farmer: OK, men - load em up!
(other scouts scurry back and forth loading the truck. When they are done, the chicken farmer and men all drive away back offstage.)
Hatcheryman: (reading the newspaper.) Well, what's that I see coming down the road? Hey, its that new Chicken Farmer's truck. It's only been a week since he was here, I wonder what he wants?
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, Charlie. I need another 10 dozen chicks.
Hatcheryman: Well, you got in the business at the right time. Prices keep going up. That'll be $120 this time.
Chicken Farmer: (pays hatcheryman) OK, load em up.
(men load up the truck again and they drive off.)
Hatcheryman: (reading the newspaper.) Well, looky there! That Chicken Farmer's back. Now what?
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, Charlie. I need another 10 dozen chicks.
Hatcheryman: Man, you must have a pretty good size chicken farm going now. That's a lot of chicks.
Chicken Farmer: Well, I'm not too sure yet. I think I'm either planting them too deep or too close together 'cause they just aren't growing too fast.
(truck drives up and stops a ways away. Driver walks over to hatcheryman.)
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, there. Is this Chattanooga Charlie's Chicken Hatchery?
Hatcheryman: Sure is, and I'm Charlie. What can I do for ya?
Chicken Farmer: Well, I've been farming beets and spuds for the past 10 years and just haven't been making any money. I read that chicken prices are going up so I'm gonna start farming chickens instead. I need me 10 dozen chicks to get started.
Hatcheryman: Great, that'll be $100. Have your men load em up from right here. (points behind him to imaginary boxes.)
Chicken Farmer: OK, men - load em up!
(other scouts scurry back and forth loading the truck. When they are done, the chicken farmer and men all drive away back offstage.)
Hatcheryman: (reading the newspaper.) Well, what's that I see coming down the road? Hey, its that new Chicken Farmer's truck. It's only been a week since he was here, I wonder what he wants?
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, Charlie. I need another 10 dozen chicks.
Hatcheryman: Well, you got in the business at the right time. Prices keep going up. That'll be $120 this time.
Chicken Farmer: (pays hatcheryman) OK, load em up.
(men load up the truck again and they drive off.)
Hatcheryman: (reading the newspaper.) Well, looky there! That Chicken Farmer's back. Now what?
Chicken Farmer: Howdy, Charlie. I need another 10 dozen chicks.
Hatcheryman: Man, you must have a pretty good size chicken farm going now. That's a lot of chicks.
Chicken Farmer: Well, I'm not too sure yet. I think I'm either planting them too deep or too close together 'cause they just aren't growing too fast.
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