Frog Collection Joke
How deep is Frog Lake?
Knee-deep, knee-deep!
A boy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, 'If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful Princess.' The boy picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog said, 'Hey, if you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful Princess, I'll love you forever.' The boy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and put it back in his pocket.
The frog yelled, 'If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll clean your house, cook for you, and love you forever.' The boy took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back.
Finally the frog asked, 'What is it? I've told you I'm a beautiful Princess, that I'll cook and clean for you and love you forever. Why won't you kiss me?'
The boy said, 'Look, I'm a cub scout. I don't have time for girlfriends, but a talking frog is really cool.
The librarian is working away when a chicken enters the library and walks up to her desk. The chicken clucks, 'Book, book, book, BOOK!'
The librarian sets a pile of four books in front of the chicken. The chicken grabs them and disappears out the front door.
About an hour later, the librarian sees the same chicken come into the library. It sets the four books down on the desk and again squawks, 'Book, book, book, BOOK!'
The librarian wonders what the chicken is doing with these books, but since they seem to be in fine shape, she takes the returns and gives the chicken 4 more books. The chicken zips out the door and down the road.
Another hour passes and the librarian hears a loud 'Book, book, book, BOOK!' She looks up from her work and sees the chicken back yet again! By now, the librarian's curiosity has gotten the better of her. She gives the chicken four more books and it heads for the door. This time, as soon as the chicken is gone, the librarian jumps up and runs to the door. She follows the chicken down the road for a half mile to an old farm. The chicken ducks through the fence and disappears into a cluster of trees.
The librarian hops the fence, and sneaks up to the trees. As she moves some branches aside, she sees the chicken standing by a pond handing each book to a frog. As the frog looks at the cover of each book, he says, 'Read It. Read It. Read It. ...'
Two frogs sitting on a lily pad when a fly came buzzing by. One frog put out his tongue, ate the fly, and started laughing. Soon the other frog joined in the laughter.
Then the other frog ate a fly and the two frogs burst out in laughter. As time went on, the frogs enjoyed the flies so much they nearly fell off their lily pad laughing.
A third frog hopped up to the first two and asked what was so funny. The first frog answered 'Time.'
'Huh?' asked the third frog.
The second frog explained: 'Time's fun when your having flies.'
Once upon a time, there was a little green frog who had a very big mouth.
The frog was hopping down the road when he met a cat. He looked at the cat and then shouted, 'CAT! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The cat replied, 'I drink milk,' and returned to cleaning its whiskers.
The little frog said, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
Then he met a dog. 'DOG!' shouted the frog, 'WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The dog said, 'I eat meat.'
The frog shouted, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
He met a cow grazing along the road and, even though the answer was obvious, the big-mouthed frog shouted, 'COW! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The cow blinked and said, 'Why, I eat grass, obviously.'
The frog shouted happily, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
He found a large snake coiled in the center of the road and shouted, 'SNAKE! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The snake hissed and looked at him before replying, 'I eat little frogs with big mouths.'
The frog blinked, then whispered in a very small voice, 'Oh... that's nice.'
Why are frogs so happy?
They eat watever bugs them!
What does a frog wear on St. Patrick's day?
Nothing!
What did the frog dress up as on Halloween?
A prince.
What car does a frog drive?
a Beetle
What's green and jumps?
A frog!
What's green and red?
A very mad frog.
What's green with red spots?
A frog with the chicken pox!
What's green with bumps?
A frog with the measles!
What's black and white and green?
A frog sitting on a newspaper.
What's green and dangerous?
A frog with a hand-grenade.
What's white on the outside, and green on the inside?
A frog sandwich!
What do you say to a hitch-hiking frog?
Hop in!
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad!
What do frogs do with paper?
Rip-it!
What happened to the frog's car when his parking meter expired?
It got toad!!
What do you call a frog that crosses the road, jumps in a puddle, and crosses the road again?
A dirty double-crosser!
What is a frogs favorite time?
Leap Year!
Why did the frog walk across the road?
He didn't... he jumped.
Why did the frog cross the road?
to see what the chicken was doing.
Why did the frog cross the road?
Some mean little kid super-glued it to the chicken.
How can you tell if a frog is deaf?
You yell 'Free Flies' and he doesn't come.
What do you call a frog with no legs?
It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
What do you call a frog with legs?
Dinner.
Why did the frog croak?
Because he ate a poisonous fly!
What is a frog's favorite game?
Croquette
What did the frog order at McDonald's?
French flies and a diet Croak
What happened to the cat and frog when they got run over?
The cat still had eight lives, the frog just croaked.
Why did the frog say meow?
He was learning a foreign language.
What's red and green and goes 100 miles an hour?
A frog in a blender.
What do you get if you add milk?
Frog nog!
What happens if you drink frog nog?
You Croak!
Why did the motorcycle rider buy a pet frog?
To pick the flies out from between his teeth!
What has more lives that a cat?
A frog - he croaks every night.
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He was going to robbit.
Why are frogs such liars?
Because they are amFIBians.
A scientist was interested in studying how far bullfrogs can jump. He brought a bullfrog into his laboratory, set it down, and commanded, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog jumped.
The scientist measured the distance, then noted in his journal, 'Frog with four legs jumped siz feet.'
Then he cut the frog's front legs off and ordered, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog struggled and jumped.
The scientist noted in his journal, 'Frog with two legs jumped two feet.'
Next, the scientist cut off the frog's back legs. Once more, he shouted, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog just lay there.
'Jump, frog, jump!' the scientist repeated.
Nothing.
The scientist noted in his journal, 'Frog with no legs is deaf.'
Top 10 Reasons Why It's Great Being a Frog
10. Babes are always kissing you because they think you'll turn into a prince.
9. Flies in your soup are a bonus.
8. You're above toads on the food chain.
7. Green goes with absolutely everything!
6. Pond Scum is a term of endearment.
5. Most restaurants have a 'no croaking' section.
4. Amphibians are at a minimum risk of appearing on Geraldo.
3. You can scratch hard to reach places with your tongue.
2. You can donate your body to science for big bucks!
1. It sure beats being a newt.
Why couldn't the snake talk?
He had a frog in his throat.
Knee-deep, knee-deep!
A boy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, 'If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful Princess.' The boy picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.
The frog said, 'Hey, if you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful Princess, I'll love you forever.' The boy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and put it back in his pocket.
The frog yelled, 'If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll clean your house, cook for you, and love you forever.' The boy took the frog out, smiled at it, and put it back.
Finally the frog asked, 'What is it? I've told you I'm a beautiful Princess, that I'll cook and clean for you and love you forever. Why won't you kiss me?'
The boy said, 'Look, I'm a cub scout. I don't have time for girlfriends, but a talking frog is really cool.
The librarian is working away when a chicken enters the library and walks up to her desk. The chicken clucks, 'Book, book, book, BOOK!'
The librarian sets a pile of four books in front of the chicken. The chicken grabs them and disappears out the front door.
About an hour later, the librarian sees the same chicken come into the library. It sets the four books down on the desk and again squawks, 'Book, book, book, BOOK!'
The librarian wonders what the chicken is doing with these books, but since they seem to be in fine shape, she takes the returns and gives the chicken 4 more books. The chicken zips out the door and down the road.
Another hour passes and the librarian hears a loud 'Book, book, book, BOOK!' She looks up from her work and sees the chicken back yet again! By now, the librarian's curiosity has gotten the better of her. She gives the chicken four more books and it heads for the door. This time, as soon as the chicken is gone, the librarian jumps up and runs to the door. She follows the chicken down the road for a half mile to an old farm. The chicken ducks through the fence and disappears into a cluster of trees.
The librarian hops the fence, and sneaks up to the trees. As she moves some branches aside, she sees the chicken standing by a pond handing each book to a frog. As the frog looks at the cover of each book, he says, 'Read It. Read It. Read It. ...'
Two frogs sitting on a lily pad when a fly came buzzing by. One frog put out his tongue, ate the fly, and started laughing. Soon the other frog joined in the laughter.
Then the other frog ate a fly and the two frogs burst out in laughter. As time went on, the frogs enjoyed the flies so much they nearly fell off their lily pad laughing.
A third frog hopped up to the first two and asked what was so funny. The first frog answered 'Time.'
'Huh?' asked the third frog.
The second frog explained: 'Time's fun when your having flies.'
Once upon a time, there was a little green frog who had a very big mouth.
The frog was hopping down the road when he met a cat. He looked at the cat and then shouted, 'CAT! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The cat replied, 'I drink milk,' and returned to cleaning its whiskers.
The little frog said, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
Then he met a dog. 'DOG!' shouted the frog, 'WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The dog said, 'I eat meat.'
The frog shouted, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
He met a cow grazing along the road and, even though the answer was obvious, the big-mouthed frog shouted, 'COW! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The cow blinked and said, 'Why, I eat grass, obviously.'
The frog shouted happily, 'OH! THAT'S NICE!' and continued down the road.
He found a large snake coiled in the center of the road and shouted, 'SNAKE! WHAT DO YOU EAT?'
The snake hissed and looked at him before replying, 'I eat little frogs with big mouths.'
The frog blinked, then whispered in a very small voice, 'Oh... that's nice.'
Why are frogs so happy?
They eat watever bugs them!
What does a frog wear on St. Patrick's day?
Nothing!
What did the frog dress up as on Halloween?
A prince.
What car does a frog drive?
a Beetle
What's green and jumps?
A frog!
What's green and red?
A very mad frog.
What's green with red spots?
A frog with the chicken pox!
What's green with bumps?
A frog with the measles!
What's black and white and green?
A frog sitting on a newspaper.
What's green and dangerous?
A frog with a hand-grenade.
What's white on the outside, and green on the inside?
A frog sandwich!
What do you say to a hitch-hiking frog?
Hop in!
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad!
What do frogs do with paper?
Rip-it!
What happened to the frog's car when his parking meter expired?
It got toad!!
What do you call a frog that crosses the road, jumps in a puddle, and crosses the road again?
A dirty double-crosser!
What is a frogs favorite time?
Leap Year!
Why did the frog walk across the road?
He didn't... he jumped.
Why did the frog cross the road?
to see what the chicken was doing.
Why did the frog cross the road?
Some mean little kid super-glued it to the chicken.
How can you tell if a frog is deaf?
You yell 'Free Flies' and he doesn't come.
What do you call a frog with no legs?
It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
What do you call a frog with legs?
Dinner.
Why did the frog croak?
Because he ate a poisonous fly!
What is a frog's favorite game?
Croquette
What did the frog order at McDonald's?
French flies and a diet Croak
What happened to the cat and frog when they got run over?
The cat still had eight lives, the frog just croaked.
Why did the frog say meow?
He was learning a foreign language.
What's red and green and goes 100 miles an hour?
A frog in a blender.
What do you get if you add milk?
Frog nog!
What happens if you drink frog nog?
You Croak!
Why did the motorcycle rider buy a pet frog?
To pick the flies out from between his teeth!
What has more lives that a cat?
A frog - he croaks every night.
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He was going to robbit.
Why are frogs such liars?
Because they are amFIBians.
A scientist was interested in studying how far bullfrogs can jump. He brought a bullfrog into his laboratory, set it down, and commanded, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog jumped.
The scientist measured the distance, then noted in his journal, 'Frog with four legs jumped siz feet.'
Then he cut the frog's front legs off and ordered, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog struggled and jumped.
The scientist noted in his journal, 'Frog with two legs jumped two feet.'
Next, the scientist cut off the frog's back legs. Once more, he shouted, 'Jump, frog, jump!'
The frog just lay there.
'Jump, frog, jump!' the scientist repeated.
Nothing.
The scientist noted in his journal, 'Frog with no legs is deaf.'
Top 10 Reasons Why It's Great Being a Frog
10. Babes are always kissing you because they think you'll turn into a prince.
9. Flies in your soup are a bonus.
8. You're above toads on the food chain.
7. Green goes with absolutely everything!
6. Pond Scum is a term of endearment.
5. Most restaurants have a 'no croaking' section.
4. Amphibians are at a minimum risk of appearing on Geraldo.
3. You can scratch hard to reach places with your tongue.
2. You can donate your body to science for big bucks!
1. It sure beats being a newt.
Why couldn't the snake talk?
He had a frog in his throat.
Follow Me, Boys
Recent Comments
Recent Comments
tiama on Bear Cub Stories
joseph on Boy Scout Uniform
G. Nethaway on Board of Review
Dawn on Webelos Super NOVA award
nicholas bogert on Merit Badges
Anna R. on Arrow of Light
Steve Bechtel on Cub Knife post
Tyquesha Wilcox on /content/game/trash_ball-1583.asp
Jack on Map Test
Lena on Webelos Uniform
More Comments...
joseph on Boy Scout Uniform
G. Nethaway on Board of Review
Dawn on Webelos Super NOVA award
nicholas bogert on Merit Badges
Anna R. on Arrow of Light
Steve Bechtel on Cub Knife post
Tyquesha Wilcox on /content/game/trash_ball-1583.asp
Jack on Map Test
Lena on Webelos Uniform
More Comments...
Contest - Ask a Question - Add Content - scout software
This site is not officially associated with the Boy Scouts of America
listeria testingscout softwareAmerican Business merit badge American Cultures merit badge American Heritage merit badge American Labor merit badge Animal Science merit badge Archaeology merit badge Archery merit badge Architecture merit badge Art merit badge Astronomy merit badge Athletics merit badge Atomic Energy merit badge Automotive Maintenance merit badge Aviation merit badge Backpacking merit badge Basketry merit badge Bird Study merit badge Bugling merit badge Camping merit badge Canoeing merit badge Carpentry merit badge Chemistry merit badge Chess merit badge Cinematography merit badge Citizenship in the Community merit badge Citizenship in the Nation merit badge Citizenship in the World merit badge Climbing merit badge Coin Collecting merit badge Collections merit badge Communications merit badge Composite Materials merit badge Computers merit badge Cooking merit badge Crime Prevention merit badge Cycling merit badge Dentistry merit badge Disabilities Awareness merit badge Dog Care merit badge Drafting merit badge Electricity merit badge Electronics merit badge Emergency Preparedness merit badge Energy merit badge Engineering merit badge Entrepreneurship merit badge Environmental Science merit badge Family Life merit badge Farm Mechanics merit badge Fingerprinting merit badge Fire Safety merit badge First Aid merit badge Fish and Wildlife Management merit badge Fishing merit badge Fly Fishing merit badge Forestry merit badge Gardening merit badge Genealogy merit badge Geocaching merit badge Geology merit badge Golf merit badge Graphic Arts merit badge Hiking merit badge Home Repairs merit badge Horsemanship merit badge Indian Lore merit badge Insect Study merit badge Inventing merit badge Journalism merit badge Kayaking merit badge Landscape Architecture merit badge Law merit badge Leatherwork merit badge Lifesaving merit badge Mammal Study merit badge Medicine merit badge Metalwork merit badge Model Design and Building merit badge Motorboating merit badge Music merit badge Nature merit badge Nuclear Science merit badge Oceanography merit badge Orienteering merit badge Painting merit badge Pathfinding merit badge Personal Fitness merit badge Personal Management merit badge Pets merit badge Photography merit badge Pioneering merit badge Plant Science merit badge Plumbing merit badge Pottery merit badge Public Health merit badge Public Speaking merit badge Pulp and Paper merit badge Radio merit badge Railroading merit badge Reading merit badge Reptile and Amphibian Study merit badge Rifle Shooting merit badge Robotics merit badge Rowing merit badge Safety merit badge Salesmanship merit badge Scholarship merit badge Scouting Heritage merit badge Scuba Diving merit badge Sculpture merit badge Search and Rescue merit badge Shotgun Shooting merit badge Signaling merit badge Skating merit badge Small-Boat Sailing merit badge Snow Sports merit badge Soil and Water Conservation merit badge Space Exploration merit badge Sports merit badge Stamp Collecting merit badge Surveying merit badge Swimming merit badge Textile merit badge Theater merit badge Tracking merit badge Traffic Safety merit badge Truck Transportation merit badge Veterinary Medicine merit badge Water Sports merit badge Weather merit badge Welding merit badge Whitewater merit badge Wilderness Survival merit badge Wood Carving merit badge Woodworking merit badge
